I feel tired. Just of everything. Of everyone. And mostly of myself. I'm so sick of responsibility. I'm just as selfish as everyone else, but I don't care. Neither does anyone else. And I'm missing out on love. Because I always turn my back. Opting instead for something worthless. And I run away from the only thing that I know will satisfy me. And I feel so wholly unsatisfied. Not so much with my life, but just with my role in it. I hate how I think, and how I act, and how I fail to be what is needed of me. I hate highschool. I hate being there or even thinking about it. I'd like to look forward to graduation and escape, but I'll probably never get out. And the reason why just goes back to how stupid I am. And how unmotivated I am to better anything in my life. Because I'm so apathetic. I'm so unaffected by reality. I'm dreaming. And it's a very bad dream. And I just want it to end. Father hear my sighs.

I tear and bleed.

I pine and perish.

I hate, and kill, and destroy.

- posted by Jonathan@ 11:34 PM