"We make prayer the preparation for work, it is never that in the Bible. Prayer is the exercise of drawing on the grace of God. Prayer is the most practical thing, it is not the reflex action of devotion."

- Oswald Chambers

I have much learning to do. Much growing.

- posted by Jonathan@ 12:10 PM

 
Railroad Bridges

There's blood on the tracks
Let it be mine,
please! let it be mine. . .

I can remember these things;
You might have once known them also.

We walked over water,
We walked to your house,
I wore your shoes on the last day.
I screamed into your brother's microphone,
and your family downstairs
must have believed I was insane.
And I was.
And I am.

I have saved a few cuss words for this occasion.
I will recite them now.
"..."

But don't be alarmed. I don't mean what I say. I just can't say what I mean. And I can't. . .

- posted by Jonathan@ 1:23 AM

 
It's 1:00 a.m. I can't sleep.

An interesting thought for you. Four days left of school this year. One more year of highschool. Then it's time to grow up. Be a man. Get a job. Start a family. Do whatever it is that men do with their adult lives. It makes me wonder. I'm only a year away from "the real world."

I need to go to college. Just to escape all that.

In two months and four days I will be 18 years old. That is a different thing. But not so different. Growing up is such a let down. Do you remember being young and looking forward to turning 18? Or even 16? Or whatever? But then, as you approach it all, you realize that it's nothing so very special. It just a number. Of days and months and years. And people are still dicks, and everyone still looks down on you, and you get a lot of new things to be hurt by. Things you didn't know where out there when you were little. Because friendship used to mean something. It was a real, tangible thing. Not just a waste of time.

- posted by Jonathan@ 12:59 AM