What's up from freaking Indiana!!?!?! (Think 80's metal). So yeah, I'm in Indiana, doing my thing. We're doing a VBS right now. It's been pretty good the past few days. Also, helping fix up some stuff around the corps. It's a pretty small corps. Not much money or help. I got stung by two separate wasps today. I stumbled upon their nest. But then I laid waste to them with a can of insecticide. The kind specifically engineered to destroy their sorry type. Doing laundry, hooking up the internet. Anyone heard from Ian lately? Are my fish still alive? I hope so.

I don't really know if I'm going to stay in Janesville anymore. Jenni got kicked out of her apartment for what seem like a bunch of BS reasons. And they decided to tell her in a freaking Starbuck's of all places. And it wasn't like an arranged meeting. She just happened to be there with a friend, and I suppose they thought it was as good a time as ever. Rather lame in my opinion. So, I am out a living space again. We'll see, we'll see.

As angry/sad/worried/upset/scared/frustrated as I am, I still manage to function day to day. And I still manage to not break down. With everything that's going on in my life. . . I don't know. It's hard to explain. But I just keep having to remind myself, "Joy and peace are the fruit I reap." Over and over. And there are days where I just want to give up and go home. But I don't even have a home. And then I just cry, you know? I feel like such a baby. Like, I've just been crying all summer long. And I'm sure people are getting sick of it. I try not to make such a big deal out of everything. But again, I am surviving. I am alive right? Breathing? Full of possibilities? And I posses an empty future that I am trusting God to fill. God is good. All the time. I can honestly say that. Because even when I feel like being really angry, and maybe wanting to blame my problems on Him, I can just feel His love and understanding. Like, He really understands me. He went through a pain unlike anything. So, I don't know what I'm trying to say really. But I know that I don't have to worry. Sometimes I'm like Peter, I've walked on water, but I start to drown when I notice the waves. But other days I'm like Paul, singing with the shackles on my arms. And it is well with my soul.

Blessings!

- posted by Jonathan@ 5:42 PM