Third Day of the End of the World: I'm here in the basement again. Zach is tracking guitar for "Everything I Do Is Motivated By A Desire to Escape". It's a nice little number. How about the fact that I got the drums done in like three takes. Halleluia! So far we have these songs. . .

"W-I-N-T-E-R-M-U-T-E"
"Don't Fret (The End Will Come, and With it New Beginnings)"
"Fairweather"

We're planning on also hooking up (in addition to the aforementioned ones) the following songs. . .

"The Sky is to Shallow to Swim"
"A Strained Breath Between Worlds"
"Pullman's Memoirs" (tentative title)

Basically this is going to be one sweet album. I highly suggest you all pick it up when it comes out. Also, I got a mewithoutYou tattoo. Probably one of the few on the planet. It's over my left shoulder blade. It's an anchor, and underneath it says, "Jan. 1979". Basically it rules.

- posted by Jonathan@ 2:43 PM

 
Day Two: I just spent about 2 and a half hours tracking a single song on drums. My butt hurts pretty badly. I need a new drum throne. We broke for a quick game of B-ball though. Me and Jenny G. basically owned Zach and Ian. Also, we drove to Beloit at lunch to pick up my acoustic. I got an electric pickup put in it. Awesome! Well, I have to call and set up an appointment for a tattoo. Later.

- posted by Jonathan@ 3:34 PM

 
Well, I'm updating from the "studio" here. Jim's basment that is. But who's counting. Is your band recording a cd? No. Didn't think so. I'm sitting here listening to Ian laying down some bass lines. Zach just went to get his check from work. I might get a tat today. I don't know what though. We'll see. I know this is like the lamest journal entry ever. I'm going to go. Stuff is sounding so good though. I spent all morning trying to get this drum track right, and now that we have guitar and bass on it. . . aahhhhhh. It's nice.

I love you.

- posted by Jonathan@ 3:22 PM

 
Hey, also: Simon's girlfriend noticed my watch and told me she thought it was cool. And I of course related the story of how long I have had it and all. And she was way impressed. So basically we just sat around talking about my watch for like 5 minutes. Finally someone who appreciates the awesomeness of my watch.

- posted by Jonathan@ 2:27 PM

 
I had a wonderful weekend. I had SMT Orientation and I left a few hours early for Chicago and got to spend some time with Ceamona. We baked cookies and just sat around and talked and gave each other hugs. It was really good. Her puppy is getting so big! Then I got a little lost leaving her house, but I got a hold of Ian and Justin and they helped me out, getting me there just in the nick of time. I was a little nervous walking in, but I got really comfortable with my team and all the others there too. It's going to be an awesome summer. I am so sure of it. It's going to be a very loooong summer, but I know that God has his hand on me, and on the whole situation.

Saturday we had a lot of time in our individual teams and I got to begin getting to know the people on my team that I didn't already know. They are all very cool people and we're going to rock this summer so hard.

Saturday night/Sunday morning I had a number of awesome conversations with some of the other guys on the teams. At one point we were just all sitting in one of the hotel rooms reading the scripture aloud. Just whatever each person wanted to share. It was awesome. Also, Mike Himes shared how he had written a scientific proof showing that homosexuality doesn't exist. It was air-tight. He drew a chart and everything. He was only partially serious I think.

Sunday was good. My team was in charge of worship, and it went smooth. All the teams participated and Chris Shay talked about some really good stuff. Then a bunch of people went to lunch at Boston Market. I gave Simon Gugala and his girlfriend (who was dropped off by friends) a ride there, and as lunch was finished and people kept leaving, their ride still didn't show. So I suggested going to Guitar World, which we of course did. And Justin and Luis came too. We killed like an hour there and then their ride showed so we said goodbye and I bailed home. Cells went awesome. I had learned so much this weekend that I wanted to share that we just ditched the plan and had a good talk. I read a lot of scriptures and we had silence and prayer and questions and answers and it was good.

Today I woke up and first thing read my Bible. It was beautiful. Now if only I could get a handle on homework. I finished another test today and now I have to go so I can write some essays.

- posted by Jonathan@ 1:56 PM

 
Don't worry about it.

- I put new strings on Rosaline, and I feel pretty darned good about that. She understands me at least.

- The new Jimmy Eat World album is really good. It's cool if you don't like it though.

- I bought a desk at Ikea last week, and things have been working out pretty nicely for me since.

- I got a coffee table and an end table also. In case you were wondering.

- And a lamp.

- I have become quite a fan of DOA. Mostly because I rule at it and deal out punishment quite ungracefuly. Ian can not stand before me.

- I am so proud of myself. Why? Well, you probably wouldn't understand.

- I'm going to go eat lunch.

The lesson has been learned. I am so over everything.

- posted by Jonathan@ 11:46 AM

 
www.terrisfight.org

I wish I would have found out about this sooner. Just looking at this and thinking about what is actually going on made me cry. You need to all look at this site. This is the most disgusting thing I have seen in a long time. I can't believe that this woman's life is going to be thrown away. If you believe at all in the sanctity of life, then you need to see this.

- posted by Jonathan@ 11:36 PM

 
I don't know. I didn't get all sad this time. I just came home and went to sleep. I guess that's good. I don't let it get me down so much. But it still was pretty hard for me. I just wish you would stop smiling at me and saying hello as if it were all cool. Because that just makes it worse. You were the one who chose this. So at least face up to that fact and be honest with the way you feel. But maybe it makes you feel like you're still an okay guy. Like it's so big of you to present this air of friendship. To make me feel better or something? Whatever man. I don't need your pity. You are the reason any of this is awkward anyways. You are the one who decided that I was not worth your time or friendship. So please just ignore me next time.


It's still cold out, but the birds were singing this morning. So that's a good sign. A hopeful sign.

- posted by Jonathan@ 3:24 PM

 
Basically, I have the best pink website around.

- posted by Jonathan@ 3:57 PM

 


Listen, I'm talking about Neil Young. Everyone should listen to The Young. And everyone should read Daily Dinosaur Comic at Qwantz.com, because as you can see above, they are hilarious.

I am a nerd.

- posted by Jonathan@ 11:34 AM

 
There is an old man named "Bud" in charge of the Dairy department at Sentry. He has got to be one of the most repulsive people I've ever known. And only in the sense that he is also one of the rudest people I've ever known. And thus, I can't stand him. I want to punch him in his old, stupid head every time I see him. Honestly, the guy is such a jerk. I have never been anything but polite and respectful to him, yet he feels the need to be a complete jerk to me. He made me so mad tonight I almost quit. But then I would never hear the end of it from my mother. But don't get me wrong, she's way more awesome then Bud.

Now that that's out, let me tell you about some of the regulars. . .

Fred - This guy comes in (on average) about 4-5 times a day. He buys either: a four pack of pudding snacks, a 20 oz. Mountain Dew, a can of soup, a package of meat, or a combination thereof. He always has something to talk about. Unless it's about the weather, then it's useless. But all the guy does is listen to talk radio, so he knows the weather.

"Herman the German" - He grossly comes on to all the young females in a grossly thick German accent. He always leaves his receipt "for de puppies", and his small change for the females he is grossly hitting on. He also tries to steal stuff.

The Three Old Ladies - I don't know what they're names are, but they are actually cool. They're all three very nice and we talk every time they come in. Which is every Wednesday. They all separately buy their own groceries and always refuse any help out to their car. They're really nice and sweet and I like them.

Those are the most interesting ones that came to mind. They're are a couple more crazy German guys that you will catch during the day time hours. Honestly, what is it with Germans and being psychos?

I want to punch Bud in the FACE!!!!!!

- posted by Jonathan@ 11:39 PM

 
Reader's rejoice! The time has come for celebration and dance! Why you ask? Well my friends, today is the two year anniversary for my blog. What a beautiful thing. Why don't you all leave nice happy birthday comments? Let me give you a quick two year recap. . .

3.3.2003 - This blog is officially born!

3.12.2003 - I got my driver's license.

5.20.2003 - The Principle of Cereal Made Flesh. Enough said.

6.13.2003 - Jesus commented on my blog. You can't see it anymore because the comment service I had at the time crashed. But the post said, "I'm sorry Jesus." And then he commented, "It's cool Jon, I still love you."

7.8.2003 - I return from Cornerstone a better person for having gone. Rock and roll does that to you.

10.26.2003 - I discover my calling to be a professional tetherball player.

11.2003 - Everyone hates me.

1.2004 - More people hate me.

2.14.2004 - My life changes for the better.

4.2004 - Prom was. . . actually fun!?!?

10.2004 - I'm in a band. Again. And another one too.

11.17.2004 - I'm on purevolume. Here.

9.2004 - Present - A lot more people hate me.

And through the whole thing God was still there for me. Even though I'm a douche bag. It seems life has just gotten harder, but he has always been there. Now if only I could learn to give up my feeble plans and trust in his strength.

- posted by Jonathan@ 11:59 AM

 
This is not an original thought. I'm just trying to work things out. I haven't even really figured out how to articulate it. I just feel so much but understand so little. I don't know what the heck I'm supposed to do with my life. And I know I'm not the only one, but that doesn't help at all. I wonder what I've been working towards all these years. I don't want to get stuck in a job that I hate, just so I can make enough money to buy crap that I don't need. I can't afford to go to school for something I'd like to study, so I know I'm just going to end up doing something else, just because I can't think of anything better. Or because it's convenient. And I want so much that isn't material. I want to get married, and have children, and live a satisfying life. I just don't see how to accomplish that. And doesn't God want me to have a satisfying life? Maybe not in the way I envision it, but satisfying nonetheless? But how can I ever be satisfied in this life? And that thought alone makes me feel so horrible. Paul sang songs while he was bound by chains, and I feel bound by chains, all the while spending money and enjoying so much freedom. It seems really silly. And selfish. But I just don't know what to do. I really just wish I could have a glimpse of what it is that my life is meant for. And not some abstract "oh, you were meant to love God and live in His plan for you" but an actual answer.

Transcontinental

Engine severs lower legs and I feel my bruised heart beating
Spinal cord remains intact--still sending & receiving
Lying back on shoulder blades, the cargo rushing past
Missing limbs beneath the cars, twitching on the tracks

Click-clack
Now handicapped
North Am Transcontinental

I remember as I bleed certain tales of bravery
A man whose legs were crushed beneath a fallen evergreen tree
He decided he would chop them off above the knees
Sacrifice his shins & feet to make his torso free

The luxury of having been spared the hard part
You'd think would be enough for me to pull this off
But I'm left to bleed to death
Now all the man I've ever been
North Am Transcontinental

- David Bazaan

That's how I feel at times. Like I've lost my legs, and even with all that I have to inspire me, I just lie down to die anyways. It's sad I know.

I'm trying Lord. I really am.

- posted by Jonathan@ 10:43 PM